Learning From People Like and Not Like Us
I have a friend named Peter. His sport of choice is Jujitsu. Peter is a big man training in a gym led by a small man. He’s not small in accomplishment, character, or expertise—he’s just eight inches shorter and 90 lbs. lighter than Peter. At some point, he probably needs to go train with someone […]
The Map is not the Terrain
A geodetic map shows terrain lines. It’s helpful if you plan to hike, bike, or ride across the land. An Atlas (the old kind printed on paper) sections the landscape into “states” or “countries” and highlights “cities” and parks and mountains and maybe roads. A road map sections the landscape in standard increments and highlights […]
Build Better Than Code
Talking with a colleague this morning about “code.” Not that kind. Building codes. They’re there for a reason. They level the playing field (everyone must meet a standard). They increase owner and buyer confidence (the building is safe, efficient, and durable). They make it possible for lenders to underwrite. Building codes also stifle innovation. You […]
What Would Happen if You Went “All In?”
The Paris Olympics has been a joy, a wonder, an occasional head-scratcher, and a living answer to the question, “What would happen if you went all in?” And the answer? Medals World Records Olympic Records Personal Bests Instagram Follows And also . . . Injuries Crushing disappointments DNF Finished last And also . . . […]
Better Conversations in Three Steps
Unless you’re a hermit, monk, or writing a book, your life is likely filled with conversations. Looking back, it’s not hard to put the ones you had yesterday (or last week) into three buckets: Great Not Great Don’t Recall We all have different ideas about what those buckets mean. It’s also true that you and […]
Be Worthy of Trust
Trust. It’s the mechanism and byproduct of social engagement. Trust and its cousin, reciprocity, were the necessary ingredients that helped our ancestors form tribes 2.5 million years ago. Trust is also hard to define with precision, at least if you’re not an academic. It’s like the famous Oliver Wendell Holmes comment about obscenity. “I know […]
Making Friends, Fast
In 1997, five people at Stony Brook University published a paper suggesting people could become good friends in under an hour. The term “good” obviously covers a lot of ground, but bear with me. The initial study paired two complete strangers. The intuition was that questions inviting personal disclosure would lead to more disclosure and […]
The Power of Curiosity
Tom Peters’ book In Search of Excellence is regarded as one of the most influential business books of all time. In an article about the book, Peters says, “There was no carefully designed work plan. There was no theory that I was out to prove. I went out and talked to genuinely smart, remarkably interesting, […]
The Three Phases of Work
Anything worth doing is worth doing well. If you believe that, then you know you need to put in the work. This is true of any category of human activity. Mastery comes through repetition and stacking one focused moment on another, one skill on another. When you start, progress seems to come quickly. The effort […]
Now or never!
From the movie Tin Cup Roy I’m ready to charge forth in pursuit of my mythic destiny and I can’t even get time off from work to do it. Romeo I’m no expert here, but it seems that the pursuit of a mythic destiny isn’t something that you need to get off a $7-an-hour job […]